It's dark, it's loud and it's full of booze - also known as 'optimum public break up conditions'. Grab some drinks and get down to business at the bar brand's subterranean Shoreditch venue where the noise is pitched so that any shouting gets carried away by happy hordes of post-work punters.
Best Bars To Break Up In London
We know, we know - it's not you, it's them, but if you want to get out of this relationship with all your fingers, toes and vintage Adidas t-shirts, you're going to have to get smart about how you play the break up. The experts may say that public displays of dumping are bad idea, but we think that the London bar scene has just the right amount of anonymity and exposure - as well as booze and food - to put the kibosh on any tears, tantrums and personal attacks on your upbringing. So whether you're looking to pour your heart out at some intimate cafe, or do the deed in a packed out club, these our top tips for break up bars in London.
Breaking up with someone just feet from a canal may sound like the perfect recipe for a splash landing, but studies have shown that contact with nature relaxes us. That's why a terrace spot at Haggerston's Barge House, with its surrounding greenery and views over the water could be the perfect spot for your break up.
The bar for the break up you need but don't necessarily want, this charming and intimate cocktail spot is here for all your soul-bearing needs. Set beneath an iconic cinema sign, it's got style, flair and a touch of melodrama - just like you - along with a 2am license on weekends for if things go late.
Many a love has blossomed on the Infernos dancefloor, but it's also a great a place to do away with its shrivelled remains. For one thing, it's big enough for you to put plenty of space between yourself and your ex, and furthermore, it's packed full of like-minded singletons so you can get to work finding their replacement.
It's one of Battersea's most popular spots for first dates, and it could be just the ticket for a final one. Packed full of games, entertainment, delicious burgers and craft beer, it's also dog-friendly, so you can even say goodbye to your ex's perfect pooch for one last time.
Chilled local boozer meets comedy mecca at this Angel pub. Break the news to your ex over a few quiet pints, where you can both air your grievances and decide who will have custody of which online streaming accounts, then laugh it off at one of the venue's excellent stand up nights - because sometimes things really are that simple.
You can't beat the anonymity of a hotel bar, and this 1920's-inspired offering from Grosvenor Square's Marriott Hotel has that perfect balance of moody lighting, excellent cocktails and regular jazz nights where the music will mask your conversation so you can stay safely out of the earshot of any eavesdroppers.
Nothing cures a broken heart quite like pizza, and that's why Martello Hall is one of London's best bars to break up in. Kick off with one of their killer cocktails and a side of "you just don't speak my love language" then make a quick getaway while they tuck into a few comforting slices. And if your future former lover is from a little further south, you can enact the exact same scene in sister site Canova Hall.
A solid option if you're going to need to make a quick getaway, this Piccadilly party bar offers big crowds, low lighting and thumping music, along with excellent transport links close by so whether you're trying to get as far away as possible, or just trying to lay low for a little while, you're covered on all accounts.